My Mid-life Crisis:
ii had, the ballin type,would call all night,keep claimin he comin thru,
the C.E.O, he'd bring me dough, cus he always had sumthin to prove,
had the meet me at the poetry spot,down to earth man,
had the player,with no goals,no heart,just game,
i had a control freak who thought that he could keep me on a chain,
and a N-Word that lied so much,
i dont even know his real name,
at the end of the day,they all made me feel the same,
i had a million things to loose and not a damn thing to gain
....
i found someone who made me smile, 24-7...laughing AT HIM, more then WITH HIM..lol..im not one to say that it could have gone into a serious relationship,but for whatever it was, it was fun while it lasted... i think that every woman is aloud to have ONE favorite mistake of her life...
Running From My Future??
if theres a REAL thing known as perfect timeing, then this is definitely it. .. so why am i so scared?..why am i holding back?..when my life seems to be falling into place almost perfectly...why am i running from it all. i have the oppurtunity to be with someone who is nothing short of greatness and yet, im all choked up. the fear of failure,and rejection..thers always ONE PERSON..that at some point chnges everything for me... i already know how i am, and seeing that i was already indirectly in-love with him..i know if i fall fa-real,ima fall hard. bekus i never do n e thing halfway..especially when it comes to love. but once again, all those failed relationships come running through my mind at the beggining of every conversation i have with him..everyone has there reasons for not wanting me..usually having to do with timing.. im always late when it comes to walking into someone elses life..everyone else is on time when they walk into myne...but i feel like this time, its TOO PERFECT...its bound to fail...im sure he'll prove me wrong though..im sure. all i can hope for is patience from him..and courage from myself...ive never been a negative person when it comes to love..im ride or die all the way..but im just sick of dieing...all thats left to do is have faith in god that this is where im suppose to be...